different to, different from

I simply miss you.
I miss you, being you.

Your routines, your skin, your smell.
Your shape.
Your silly little philosophies.

I miss standing in the bathroom watching you apply night cream.
How you would do it so very gracefully. You always said you got it from your mother. You'd watched her as a child.

I would stand behind you and not look at you, but at the reflection of you in the mirror. Your face would look different from that angle.
Different to real life. I always found it fascinating.

I don't know how to gracefully apply night cream. And every time I ungracefully stumble through it, I think of you.

drake passage

I’m cutting you off. And it’s killing me.
Which is funny because I’m cutting you off to
achieve exactly the opposite.
To survive.